my first 'true' love…

Well, it’s really fun taking a walk back… reliving the lost-forever moments – both convivial and obnoxious… It’s so wonderful… Yesterday, in a rather stodgy Sunday afternoon, I was trying to recollect my past-life… Surprisingly, I realized, what I had been searching for years back, I have not found YET…

My quest for so-called ‘unfeigned love’ eventually came to an end (at least I thought so… I genuinely did…) when I was in the fourth standard… She was a Muslim girl and hence beautiful… For years I believed it’s only Muslim girls who were beautiful… And this perception of mine hung on to me for years as I came across and invariably fell in love with myriad girls at various points of time in my life… And, undoubtedly, majority of girls I fell in love with in the early part of my life were Muslims… further cementing my perception and affection towards them…

I found it extremely difficult to find enough time to behold her guileless countenance as she belonged to 4 A, while I was from 4 B… I began to feel restless as I felt the short intervals in between lectures (two in a day) were getting shorter and shorter… For the first time in my life, I started waiting for exam days… While all my friends would agitatedly flip through lessons to be grasped before the ostracized arrival of the exam day, I would gently sit in a corner of the big classroom and visualise my constant eye-contacts and a rare exchange of smile with my beloved during the exam days… coz that was the only time all fourth standard students would be seated under one roof for the convenience of conducting the exams… And my teachers never knew that it was of much convenience to me rather than anyone else in the universe… How much I was grateful to them...probably they never understood… And, I am sure, they still don’t…